your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
