Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
