My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
