This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
