Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
