I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
