walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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