Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Randomize