Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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