yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize