how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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