Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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