Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
tell your sister to shave her snatch
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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