Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
