So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
