OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize