Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
