just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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