you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize