If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
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