You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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