He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
