awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
