I must be too annoying 4 u.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
