I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Do you have feelings for this penis?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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