Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
