What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
