So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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