between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
