i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
