her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
