Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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