I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
