We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
