This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
It's shark week go big or go home
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
