Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Well I just put wine in my tea
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
