I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
