Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
