I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
