Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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