What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
