Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
