if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
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