The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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