i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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