4 words: hood of his car
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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