i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize