Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
