So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
