I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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